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Wednesday
Dec032008

MU Fun with Real Movie Quotes

Credit: AdamL212 (Flickr CC - click photo for location)

 

Following KU’s victory over the University of Missouri last Saturday a few celebrities were asked to give their thoughts. Read on to see what they said.

 

1) If you could say anything to ease the pain Mizzou felt after Saturday’s loss, what would it be?

Clark Griswold (Vacation): O God, ease our suffering in this, our moment of great despair. Yea, admit this kind and decent woman into thy arms of thine heavenly area, up there. And Moab, he lay us upon the band of the Canaanites, and yea, though the Hindus speak of karma, I implore you: give her a break.

 

2) What did Pinkel say to Chase Daniel after the loss?

Lloyd Christmas (Dumb and Dumber): Man, you are one pathetic loser. No offense.

 

3) I noticed you were at the game last Saturday, and said a few words to the KU players just before the winning drive, what did you say?

Frank the Tank (Old School): Blue, do you trust that I do not want to see you die here tonight?... Blue, you're my boy!

 

4) I know you know Chase Daniel pretty well, what was he thinking when he threw those interceptions?

Ted Striker (Airplane): concentrate... concentrate... I've got to concentrate... concentrate... concentrate... Hello?... hello... hello... Echo... echo... echo... Pinch hitting for Pedro Borbon... Manny Mota... Mota... Mota...

 

 5) That game was a nailbiter. There was a lot of praying going on in the 4th Qtr. What did you say when KU won, as you were finishing off your hot dog and popcorn?

Gaylord Focker (Meet the Parents): Oh, dear God, thank you, you are such a good God to us. A kind and gentle and accommodating God, and we thank You oh sweet, sweet Lord of hosts for the smörgåsbord You have so aptly laid at our table this day, and each day, by day, day by day, by day oh dear Lord three things we pray to love Thee more dearly, to see Thee more clearly, to follow Thee more nearly, day, by day, by day. Amen.

 

6) Hey, you know Chase Coffman pretty good. What did you say to him after the loss?

David (40 Year Old Virgin): You know how I know you're gay? You have a rainbow bumper sticker on your car that says, "I like it when balls are in my face."

 

7) What did you think about KU’s comeback?

Cotton McKnight (Dodgeball): Ladies and gentlemen, I have been to the Great Wall of China, I have seen the Pyramids of Egypt, I've even witnessed a grown man satisfy a camel. But never in all my years as a sportscaster have I witnessed something as improbable, as impossible, as what we've witnessed here today!

 

8) I heard you talked with Coach Pinkel after the game, did he say anything to you?

Tommy (Tommy Boy): Forget it, I quit, I can't do this anymore, man. My head's about to explode. My whole life sucks! I don't know what I'm doing, I don't know where I'm going. ...I'm out here getting my ass kicked and every time I drive down the road I wanna jerk the wheel into a (expletive) bridge abutment!

 

9) Since KU evened the series at Arrowhead this year, it’s been said that more fans might go to the game next year. Are you OK with more KU fans coming out to show support?

Eddie Haskell (Leave it to Beaver): Wally, if your dumb brother tags along I’m gonna- Oh, good afternoon Mrs. Cleaver. I was just telling Wallace how pleasant it would be if Theodore would accompany us to the game.

 

10) It’s been said that MU folks have been likened to dirty rats. What say you about MU fans and what KU did to them last Saturday?

Carl Spector (CaddyShack): To kill, you must know your enemy, and in this case my enemy is a varmint. And a varmint will never quit - ever. They're like the Viet Cong - Varmint Cong. So you have to fall back on superior intelligence and superior firepower. And that's all she wrote.

Reader Comments (3)

Well done, sir. (My only contention is that the win was "improbable", but funny nonethless)
December 3, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterhiphopopotamus
Thanks HipHop. You're right, "Improbable" really didn't apply, did it? But, then again Cotton is not the sharpest tool in the shed. Perhaps we should have instead interviewed his sidekick Pepper Brooks for more insightful comments. I'm sure there is a quote there somewhere!
December 3, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterROWYHO
Yeah, beating Mizzou is not improbable. Coming from behind in the final drive in the fourth quarter in a huge must-win game -- that's something new for KU football. Thinking of Mario's Miracle in hoops, I'm liking this trend.
December 4, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDJ

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